Weekly World News alert: Titanic survivor want to be returned to deserted island!

Publication: Weekly World News (via the Sun)
Date: 4 July 2011

The Weekly World News has two headlines this week, which is a good thing because Nostradamus isn't giving any specific dates on the cover, so no Skeeter Davis Alert™. This week they say a Titanic survivor wants to be returned to her deserted island because "I can't stand another day of civilization!"

While I understand the sentiment, I would like to point out a few historical facts to the tabloid readers with double digit IQs.

1. The Titanic sunk in 1912, not 1997 when the movie was made.
2. The Titanic sunk in the frigid north Atlantic, not the balmy south Pacific. If any lifeboat made it to a deserted island, it would be a miserable, hard-scrabble existence like Shackelton, not a fun adventure like Robinson Crusoe or Gilligan's Island.

Sorry to spoil the fun with boring stuff like math and geography.